Lessons learnt.

It feels almost surreal, being here after what can only be described as one helluva roller coaster ride, this moment, to breath, to stop.
Have come a long way from the vulnerable, naive, 20 something damsel in distress. And it feels good! So many lesson learnt - some forgotten, some that gnaw every moment within, some yet to unfold.
Been writing down as and when they dawn upon me, these lessons. Figured it is time to share, so here they are

• You are ALWAYS responsible for your own actions.
• NEVER make a decision in anger.
• Let go. And the fight is over.
• You CANNOT control your life, just surf it's waves and befriend the unknown.
• BE the friend you seek in another.
• The heart heals itself. Period.
• DO NOT underestimate the power of the human spirit.
• Fear to love is fear to live.
• If you never try you will never know.
• "Lest we forget how fragile we are."
• NEVER love more than you are loved.
• "Travel only with thy equals or thy betters; if there are none, travel alone.
• Happiness is in our nature, we will find it within, not outside of ourselves.

Well, these are the few facts I'm sure of. They ARE the absolute truth.

As I learn more, I will share more.

For now, I'm glad to be back!

Rainbow Connection: Rangeele – The colour of a breath of fresh air

Rainbow Connection: Kailasa.Rangeele.The colour of a breath of fresh air

Rangeele – The colour of a breath of fresh air

A chance to meet one of my favourite bands, Kailasa, was all I could have asked for and when my wish came true, the experience was surrea­­l. I reached a little late, only to find out that the band hadn’t arrived yet. Phew! I waited around with friends, wondering all along what I would ask them. My head was brimming with questions and all I could think of was what the band has in store for us.

Kailash walked in first, greeting us and quickly got down to speaking his heart out. That is the only way he speaks, straight from his heart. And he was kind enough to share some of his innermost emotions and sentiments about music, love, truth and reality. He began by sending out a request to all readers and listeners. It is simple he said, if we want change, we must make it ourselves. You want a better country, go vote. Even if you feel there's no appropriate candidate, you need to go register that. Because it counts. You count.

Then he moved to his new album, 'Rangeele'. He believes that the music of their new album, ‘Rangeele’ does not belong to any one genre but is as such an explosion of fresh and innovative sounds, leaving you wanting more. In fact, they belong to a new genre, a genre that the band has created, that stands for everything divine and heavenly – a genre they call, Kailasa. On asking what according to him is the colour of love, pat came his reply with a wide grin and a glint in those eyes, "White!" I asked him, what about truth and he paused, not for long. Then leaned over and said, "Truth is formless. There is no colour. Truth is Truth!"

The album is a melange of songs with a range of impressions; the title track is all about being light-hearted but still being perceptive of the ways of the world. It’s heartening for today’s generation of dreamers and romantics to leap forward to their own calling, still staying grounded and true to their heart. Kailash confessed to being an all heart-no mind kind of individual. He loves love and has countless takes on the different kinds of love that are. Another interesting aspect to Kailasa is that they introduce new words to their lyrics, that Kailash creates himself, in each of their albums. For instance, the word ‘Khaggad’ in Babam Bamm from Jhoomo Re released in 2007, is a word made by Kailash to indicate hardcore. And ‘Rangeele’ also offers a new word; this time around it’s “Kheliya” from the song ‘Albeliya’, meaning player. The song speaks of how the Force is the only “player”, who is merely letting us have our moments of believing that we are calling the shots. And no matter what we do, it is actually the Force that conducts the grand finale.

All songs for Kailasa are written by Kailash Kher and enhanced further by melodious tunes, thanks to Paresh Kamath and Naresh Kamath. And ‘Rangeele’ brings out the versatility of the band this time around, with some never heard instruments that have created a power-packed album, which is easy on the ear. There is lot of focus on the overall resonance of the album, with unique sounds that blend so well with each other, creating perfect harmonies. While listening to some of the songs on this album, I couldn’t help but wonder how enjoyable the experience must’ve been for the guys to get together and make this a must hear. One of my favourites on this album is “Tu kya Jaane”, which even though is complaining of heartache, somehow manages to lift your soul with its striking lyrics and pleasant tune. Another track that touches my heart and will surely have the same effect on anyone who listens up, is “Bab-baji’, a song that is dedicated to Kailash’s little son. It has beautiful lyrics intertwining flavours of love that are so pure and real, quintessential to what Kailasa stands for.

Kailasa has come a long way with “Rangeele”, offering some contemporary sounds in each track on the album. It never leaves Kailash’s distinct style of song writing and singing and yet comes in like a breath of fresh air, whole and immaculate.

All for Blanknoise Project!

Read about Blanknoise Project and visited their blog as I’m a keen blogger too, especially about things that really matter. I feel what they have got here is by far one of the most remarkable actions in a long time.
I clearly understand the feelings of all those women who have contributed to the blog as I can relate to them through my incident. Although, I wasn’t victimized as I fought back, and how! I’m all of 23 now, but two years ago, while going to a friend’s place to join him for a morning walk, this is what happened…
Firstly, it is important to mention the clothes I was wearing – an oversized, zipped up sweat-shirt, track pants that reached my ankles, sports shoes with socks rolled up. In other words, not provocative! What’s important to mention next is my built. I’m a small built girl, who seems timid and naïve. Of course, the operative word being SEEMS!
And so I’m heading to my friend’s place for which I must take a lonely alley. And that’s where this man, twice my size, stood waiting for his next victim. This area is one of the lanes near Chapel Road in Bandra, Mumbai. For those of the readers who know this area, will understand the kind of housing system here too. It’s simple to get people to help by sheer yelling. But that morning, it wasn’t the case. I passed by this spineless man, who groped me before I even knew it. And the next thing was my little but powered fist with my cell phone still in it, in his face. He had a cycle which he quickly sat on to scram. But I kicked it and he fell down. I caught him by the collar and screamed for my friend in a voice I didn’t know was ever in me. But before he could come down, all the sleepy neighbours were out looking at this morning show. I asked them to help me, but “let it be…” was all they could say in between their lazy yawns. But this didn’t stop me for yelling out again for my friend, who by then had reached. He is of average built, but all he asked me was, “Sam, what did he do?” and the rage he saw in my eyes was enough for him to slap the man just once. He did that, and the man was on the floor now, screaming for mercy. Mercy was always good to ask for. But he denied, and that only worked against him. I was merciless by then. And the people, now all 150 of them, were watching and asking me to calm down. But no frikkin’ way! He had touched me and made me feel like a thing so disgusting that I just couldn’t forgive or forget. I kicked him in the face; I slapped him till it hurt him. And my friend only held him for me to do whatever I wanted to do to him. And then a lady, who apparently knew him, came around from behind me while I was busy calling the cops, to tell him how he just had to deny everything as I had no proof, by saying he had slipped and fallen on me. By the way, she happened to be a lawyer. I went up to her, and asked her if she had a daughter. She nodded affirmatively. I asked, “If I was your daughter, would you still be giving him legal advice against me?” she walked away. And nobody came forward to ask any more questions. The next thing I did was take him to the cops. I was studying as a media student in a reputed college. I informed the cops that if they didn’t beat him up in front of me, I was calling the Press. And they did. It didn’t undo what he did to me. But I left the police station not feeling like a victim.
His name was Mohammed; so much for sharing the name of the Prophet. And in between all the punches and kicks I threw at him, I asked him his name and when he replied I looked him in the eye and said, “It’s people like you who spoil the reputation of an entire community and add fuel to the fire.” He obviously wasn’t equipped with a brain to understand that. But I did my best to not feel like I victim and I’m sure today that I never was.
I also managed to get a job with a leading newspaper on the editorial team.
I’d like to share my story with the rest of the readers who have been victimized as they need to know that they may not be the strongest but when you are wronged, you get the strength from within. Just never lose faith in yourself. All else will follow.

Cheers!

Serve the EGO...

I’ve been down so long that it looks like up to me....can understand Jimi baba...history repeats itself...only we choose to be or not to be a part of it...remember, that is the question?! It doesn't matter why we choose to participate or not in this history...so technically we are all living in the past...only that we don't realize it...and I realized this, today, and it was worth mentioning so I have...
It may be true that we bring our destiny upon ourselves through our rnanubandhana…popular as karmic debt…but that does NOT mean we can justify each action, especially that which causes harm or hurt to another, or us by calling it Karma…for there is also an alertness and awareness required in the process of being…which we must know of, and do learn given a chance…to be. And it’s so difficult to simply be, that it takes people more than one life to get there; on the other hand you have those who can attain it in a moment…for eternity…
Having said this, it is also important to mention here that everyone’s yardstick of measuring is differently made, I know some who don’t have yardsticks, simply because they don’t measure, and that’s a good thing…when I say measure I mean anything and everything…
But the mind is a wicked place with only traps, that get you when you least expect them, thus expect the unexpected…and then there are little nooks and crannies that we miss out trying to figure things ourselves, but we are simply humans …and to get to the other side, the mind is of no use…it will in fact play the devil’s advocate in trying to make you stay...and most of us just give in and stay back. Never set off towards the absolute truth, too busy in the mundane activities of the world…and it keeps gnawing in your insides till you can’t take the excruciating ache in your soul and you choose to get lost…to go find another way, an easier route, but that’s just again a trap my friend, set in your mind, against you…so that you get tricked into becoming one with the mind alone…leaving your body and soul behind…and the mind can never attain salvation for it is not a matter of the mind, it is your heart and soul that is pure and will always be, and anything you do in this world or society, will only stem from your mind, for it is that which has been struck with ego since the day your were born, conditioned to the needs and conveniences of others around you and you may not like knowing this but it's the truth…we are all serving our own as well as another's ego at all times, thus surviving....living doesn't need an ego...it has life...no ego...we are the ones that make 'I' instead of 'WE'! oh well...this may not be all I have to say, but I'm done writing for now...

HARD CANDY

The weekend was good with some good movies to catch up. I'm already obsessing over Hard Candy. This is seriously worth watching. It’s gripping till the end; very few movies can do that to me! And strangely I feel so much for the fourteen year old girl, who has done some extraordinary work. Haven’t seen such an expressive face in a while, especially worn by a fourteen year old! Although she may not be fourteen, she sure can pull it off and how! It’s the story of Hayley, a fourteen year old girl with multiple internet identities, surfing the net till she meets Jeff, at a local coffee shop. Jeff is a fashion photographer. Understand his lifestyle then. They end up at his place and if you’re thinking the obvious, please think again! Coz OH MY GOD!!! It takes the most erratic and inconceivable turn. And the kid lands up there, only to be shown the reality about Jeff. And she takes him through his whole life, controlling his mind before he can even think. And she gives him two options by the end of it all, for he is in an unmentionable state of mind. He’s has become completely incapable of any action but what she asks of him. The twist here is how this little kid succeeds in controlling the man’s mind, right till the end. Don’t worry, I’m not telling you how, can’t give away the story really! Just know that this psychotic thriller is so worth a watch! Please pretty please watch and let me know if you like it!:)

59 years of Freedom

Are we really free?

‘Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose’ sang Janis Joplin and rightly so says Samiyah Saud

It’s yet another day of celebration and festivities in admiration of the freedom struggle that took place 59 years ago, giving us the independence we are yet to enjoy. Yet to enjoy, because after all these years, your average Indian of today is probably thinking, ‘Are we really free?” With the recent chain of violent and ghastly tragedies the country has faced, it is only natural that we are filled with such doubts and worse, feelings of rage, distress and resentment. Let’s not forget that these tragedies aren’t very recent, because we all know that if one part of the country is peaceful, there is always some other part, that is facing inconceivable ordeals. It’s simple to lose track of how long the Kashmir issue has existed because you reach a point of saturation and then it becomes a way of life. And even if you still care, you know you are in no position to do anything about it as a mere citizen.

Today, as we celebrate Independence Day and 59 years of freedom, there’s still uncertainty of how many more battles we might have to fight before really enjoying the triumph passed down by our forefathers. And while our country vows of its “rich and varied heritage”, and claims that “all Indians are my brothers and sisters”, it barely lives up to its words. Civic apathy has transcended to a whole new level and the nation is forced to live with terrorism, natural disasters, corruption, poverty and list could go on.

While freedom can just be a state of mind, there’s still more to it when it involves an entire country. Many are still eagerly waiting for independence; from poverty, corruption, injustice, violence, et al. Over the years, it has been India giving refuge to globetrotters, but with a lack of gratitude from the same. Deliberate attempts have been made to destroy the oneness this nation offers. While we have all the possible communities living here, it is this deliberate disparity that allows differences and insecurities to creep in. There may be cultural harmony making this a united nation, but unity is highly overrated. Says Neharika Singh, a college student, (read ‘the future of the nation’), “We are not free. Freedom means to do anything and everything without imposing on another’s liberties. Going by this definition, freedom is anything but existent in its entity as today very few people stop to think of whether what they’re doing is affecting another or not.” Collin D’Cunha, a film student and an aspiring filmmaker reiterates, “We are not free from bureaucracy; till now freedom of expression is curbed, not in obvious ways, but in ways of censorship, political power or fear of political pressure. A common citizen cannot express himself or herself in any way, there is no sense of patriotism, given that we are constantly dealing with terrorism. Instead of going out there and enjoying myself, I’d rather sit safely at home.” While this is what the youth have to say about freedom, there’s more that grown ups include. David De Souza, a freelance photographer says, “While we are technically free, we are captive to fascism. That means someone thinking they are righter, more moral, more powerful, more connected and then deciding what is good and proper. But I would rather live here than in Burma or Angola!”

Mahesh Aney- popular cinematographer adds, “We are free, when you look at it on the whole. As a nation I am free; I can breathe, I can live, I can go out and get myself what I want. But then there are my evil politicians, who decide what to do, they decide my life, they decide how much money is to be spent. So we have a notional freedom we all live in although we are the biggest democracy in the world. As Janis Joplin sang, ‘Freedom's just another word for nothin' left to lose.’ It’s just about discerning how free I am from the system, from the politics and all the evils that it brings.”

The country promises equal opportunities for all and the very fact that we are open to globalisation shows that perception is changing and global players entering the market have faith in the system. Accountability is becoming one of the key factors in our country including in the government. Women have equal opportunity, equal say and their opinions are valued and valid. However, all these changes are seen only in the urban areas of the country. There is still a massive section of the country that is tagged as ‘backward’. Even as we are working towards development in all the possible fields, it is our sense of belonging to one country, one world and one universe that will see us through it all. It’s about time we start realising that we are one, together we suffer, together exist and forever will recreate each other.

No mind to mind-Stage Zero.

Since there's too little time and so many things to do, I guess the speed of our thoughts does prove to be an "unfair challenge" in relation to our ability of speaking or writing. Although there is a stage where one doesnt need words anymore. Having said that, what is most intriguing is the fact that we still think, at times, so hard that our mind begins to stop making sense. And the nonsense that it starts to throw up then becomes a reality - our own reality. To live in and live by.
So we have people dying across nations because they are being bombed. In some corner of the earth, there is a war going on, in another there is a celebration and in yet another place, there is apathy towards it all. These are just three insatnces, where we all know alot more exists. The point is that no matter what, we are using our mind to a state where it no more has any positive outcomes. It's all negative. Politicians, terrorists (same thing!), diplomats, cops, media, and of course, people. They are in a negative state of mind for their own reasons.
Now we all know what collective consciousness can do. Some say miracles can happen only because of the collective forces. And in this collective negative state of mind, we are all focusing on a negative outcome. What's worse is that we don't even know it, there is no awareness whatsoever. Not knowing where we are headed is alright, as is being lost, for it comes with the hope of being found but knowing you're on the wrong track and still going on with the journey is plain lack of concern. Lack of concern for those who are travelling with you, and from them, those who are merely following your footsteps for lack of their own intelligence and sense of direction. And since you are responsible for their journey, a responsiblity you are unwilling to acknowledge, let alone accept, they are in for a very wicked ride. A ride that might just leave them jaded, confused, angry and hurt. Please don't forget that these are all quintessentially negative outcomes. And because it is all taking place at a collective level , so will its consequences. Don't even get me started on what can follow. Some of it is already showing, with Tsunamis and cyclones and earthquakes and floods. That's nature's way of taking things into her hands and setting things straight.
Human beings seek revenge, they feel a compelling need to even the score, and they do that in places like battlefields, politics and hostilities of all kinds. And amidst this man made chaos, it is the innocent that suffer the most. Infants and the elderly are the prime victims. And somehow, they manage to go unnoticed for they don't matter in the scheme of things. How can an infant vote for a politician? Or how does an aged citizen add to the national income? So they have no one to score brownie points with just to stay alive. The rest of us, who form a considerable part of this system are covered and confined so long as we continue to crave, create and consume and of course, play by its rules. If you don't, you're anti-social, a threat to upcoming economies and corrupt politicians or worse, dead!
And all this, thanks to the human mind. It's a massive space in there, in your mind, in every mind. We have just made most of it "off-limits" thus controlling a very small portion of this vast milieu and in an attempt to control (being the control-freaks that we are!), we have forsaken the avenues that it has to bequeath. This has ony led to restricting what we can do, what we can see and how much there is to feel.
At the end of the day, what matters to me may be irrelevant to you, but please remember to dredge up all the lives you have touched and are around before you set out into oblivion. To enter the alien void, you need to leave your mind behind. You need to reach Stage Zero.